So school (and hence my job) has been on a two-week break. It’s been nice (after I recovered from my nasty illness). I’ve spent the days cleaning my house, visiting family and friends, reading books both to my kids and to myself and my gym membership started on January 1st so I went to the pool, which was awesome!
I also have been querying my just completed YA contemporary novel (this is where you try to find a literary agent in order to sell your work to a publisher). To be quite honest, I am holding out no hope really of landing one. But I do it anyways so then I can move on to my next book, which I think I will return to non-fiction which was the first book I wrote about 7 years ago when I was called to this “career”.
One of the books I read was City of Bones by Cassandra Clare. I saw the movie version and liked it, so of course I grabbed the book since it’s in one of my favorite genres to write (YA paranormal).
I liked the book (except for the ending) and would recommend it if you like that stuff, but it was depressing to read for the simple fact it made me jealous–jealous because I don’t think I can write that good of a book. It made me want to start writing another YA paranormal almost instantly–until I thought I have no inspiration at the moment.
After reading City of Bones, I believe my current novel to be utter crap and won’t go anywhere like the rest of the books I’ve written.
So now what? Well, I pray. Pray for my book. Pray I write something that will impact someone somewhere. Pray someone will believe in that dream with me as well–enough to get me published. Pray I do God’s work and not my own.
So why is this my ideal life? Because I got to read a book! I haven’t read a book outside of kids books since Killing Jesus (and that took me almost 3 months to finish)!
I got to do what I wanted to do (for the most part), which is sit around and read books. No kids activities to run to. No guitar lessons to make. No job I had to get up for…
Still, there is something deep inside of me that craves more. It craves this book (whatever that will be). It craves it more than a pregnant woman would ice cream. And the restlessness inside of me never goes away until I have it…
Why don’t you send us the first chapter of your book? I would love to read it whether it ever gets published or not. Maybe someone would know enough to give you some “good” critique. Good luck!!! I have a dream of writing children’s books and at 68 I still haven’t gotten started. Don’t give up on yours. Actually I just wrote a picture book of my son’s dog, Sage, whom he recently put to sleep. It’s great even if I say so myself. It will never get published nor am I looking for it to get published. It is worth millions to my son. He never knew I had so many pictures. DORA
Your feeling should be a normal part of wanting to achieve something that is your passion. It shows you have goals for yourself and that is a good thing. Hang in there and I believe you will accomplish writing a book that will be enjoyed by many.
I think it is wonderful that you have a dream and are striving for it. I am 60 yrs. old and feel like I am just waiting to die and go to my Lord. My days are boring. Read a book? No as my husband would sulk around as I am not up doing something. For 37 years I worked fulltime. Raised one child. Handmaiden and sex machine. I darned well should do as I want, not what he wants me to do. I pray for guidance and strength. Someone needs a bop on the head (yes, me too). Follow your dream!! I do agree with Dora about the first chapter. Could set things in motion.
Maybe God wants you to write something that honors Him instead of the paranormal.
Praise God Wendy, that is what I was going to write.