I keep asking this right now in my life.
I feel I have all these passions and talents and yet no direction and no motivation.
What am I supposed to be doing and why am I here are my favorite questions right now to ask God.
This follows yesterday’s Free Will post. I can choose what to do but is it what I’m supposed to be doing or is it something else entirely–and worst, is it in the wrong direction?
Is it all for naught? A waste of my precious time I could be doing something with my kids?
I question everything these days. I just wish it would be clear…
I fight every day the question of what’s the point? Nothing makes sense right now.
Yet all I can do is what I have been doing…praying and waiting and seeking the sign, the answer in whatever form it may come.
Do you remember when you were 1st in love with your husband? Do you remember the incredible feelings of joy and just overwhelmingly knowing that he was THE right guy?
You already know right from wrong. You already know righteousness from evil. So doesn’t it make sense that if you make a choice, you will know it is the right one? You will understand, because just like when you knew the hubby was THE guy….. God’s love and grace will surround you.
You may not get a “sign” or a concrete answer, but the Holy Spirit will fill you with the knowledge that you are doing the right thing.
Sometimes we miss the obvious when we look as hard as you appear to do.
One word to guide you: Patience!
Well A to Z, Now I have a dilemma. Don’t have a clue what to do, so I will pray, ask for guidance from friends and family and see what happens next. You know that I am a retired soldier, and a couple of opportunities have presented themselves to me. (Here is a freedom of choice dilemma as well). Strangely they were both Job offers (I do currently work in a job I hate), and they almost simultaneously came into my email. One job is doing one of the things I love (Transportation Logistics Planning and Operations) and the other is something new and different, but sort of in the realm of the strategic planning I like to do. The former is in Afghanistan, 1 year. Pay is 175K. The latter is in Iraq, and comes in at 125K. Now, the dilemma I have is do I leave my family for a year (Mind you I have been deployed many years cummulatively while in our 24 years of marriage) or do I forgo both opportunities? The danger aspect isn’t something I dwell upon, it is the lonliness aspect. The worst thing is that I could die, but why is that so bad when I know where I am going? I do have the support of my wife, and the money is great and really I could just sit around for a couple of years afterwards and not do anything. Or does God have a plan for afterwards, and that is why He is presenting these to me? You see, the reason I am posting this is because even other people struggle with the exact same things you do. We are all just God’s children, and yes, I would love a concrete sign from Him to say “Steve, do this one”! But in His way, He will make sure I do the one He needs me to do. So I will pray for His guidance and wisdom, and in the next few days sort through everything and use the patience He has instilled in me to make the right decision…….
I am curious as to how you found employment after retiring from the Army. I too am retired military, but have not found any opportunities. Would you email me at tgrajek@hotmail.com? Thanks.
Tom
I will pray for you as well, Steve. I appreciate your sharing here especially since I’ve been curious about you for a while now. It’s good to know I’m not alone.
Your wife and family sound amazing (say “Hi” to her for me, will ya?). I too have and do go long periods without seeing husband so I appreciate her gift to support you and her sacrifice as well as yours. My husband gets lonely too when he’s away (hence he dragged me here to be together a bit more).
I love your reasoning: there’s something beyond this next coming year–to use you in some other way.
I pray God speed you in the decision-making process and give you peace afterwards. God bless you and yours.
Everything you just said…I have said these also over the past 4 months. I am an unemployed educator (administration) who filled out 19 applications over the past 4 months with only one phone call–didn’t get the job. Soooo, I’m back in school wondering if this will lead anywhere.
I am blessed to be a retired soldier with pay and benefits. Also, my wife can still stay home, our house is paid for and we have no debt. I could stay home and be unhappy, or I could continue praying that God would allow me to be used in any capacity He chooses.
Right now, that capacity is an unpaid internship at a local school district working for the Superintendent of Schools 20+ hours/week. It gives me purpose, experience, and opportunities to do the Lord’s work. Will I be employed next year? God knows, but more importantly He knows my heart.
But I am in good company: Noah was 500 years old, Abraham was 75, Moses was 80 years old, David had to wait until he was 30 before reigning as king. And of course Jesus was approximately 30, but I’m no Jesus (praise God). What is a year or two to wait? It’s all in the perspective: mine or God’s.
It appears you have chosen your perspective wisely: “Yet all I can do is what I have been doing…praying and waiting and seeking the sign, the answer in whatever form it may come.”
Psalm 72:12-14 (NASB)
“For he will deliver the needy when he cries for help,
The afflicted also, and him who has no helper.
He will have compassion on the poor and needy,
And the [b]lives of the needy he will save.
He will rescue their life from oppression and violence,
And their blood will be precious in his sight”
The lesson this past week was very specific for the Disciples. to wait, pray , and fellowship until the filling of the Holy Spirit. Also, any work done without the Holy spirit leading is for naught. As a person sith A.D.D. waiting and hanging out until….????? when???? is not on my list of thiings easily accomplished. But wiat I do and I am learning to pray more, speak less and …wait. Oh, that is a hard word for me! I want to “get the show on the road”! Not hang outr and wait! I can do many things, I have the where withall…but wait??? I choose to wait upon the Lord and let Him work in and through me. He knows my talents, He gave them to me. Why can’t Je send me a concise list so I can get busy and DO!?! But no, I wait. that is the lesson at hand for me now. I urge you to learn with me and be patient, too (not a normal part of my personality!)Until I am willing to yield my desire to get going, I am afraid I will just be in a wasteful waiting mode. “Yet those who wait upon the Lord will gain new strength…”Isaiah
40:31
OK, so I am going to turn both down. Not that there is anything wrong with either, it’s just the little voice and feeling I have that says this is not the right thing to do at this time.
For TG: You will find that the GS arena is very “Good Ole Boy”, and after literally hundreds of applications, I gave up on it. I work for a defense contractor, and the job itself……. sucks….for lack of a better term… But I do love the people I work with and for. A rule of thumb that I tell my former soldiers is that when they retire is to allow for 1 month of looking for every 10K they want to make. I highly recommend that you network. About 11% of jobs awarded come from job boards (Monster, Career Builder, etc) 88% come through networking. I highly advise that you create a Linked-In account and start connecting with people you know. You will be able to see who they are connected with, can get introduced, and this helps to get “in” to certain companies/Positions.
Keep plugging away A to Z , your work IS God’s work, and not only do you “share”, but you bring people together.
Thank you for the prayers!
You’re welcome and thank you for the encouraging words and great advice to Tom. Tom’s been hanging around my blog since the beginning and I know he’s struggled in the job arena so I appreciate you giving him advice. I hope it helps him. He’s got a real heart for God (as you do as well).
Thanks for the update on your situation. It’s nice to know you’ll still be around to chime in when you see fit!
Do take care of yourself!
My husband has recently retired from teaching school and coaching as well as an FCA (Fellowship of Christian athletes leader) for 34 years and doesn’t want to be retired. He was ready to JUMP because it is so easy to find a place to serve. Besides the fact that he is chairman of deacons, Sunday school teacher. He is used to having relationships with kids where he makes a difference for the glory of God. I am in your boat, same old, same old–not enough time in the day to do what I HAVE TO DO and how does my husband find all this time. Anyway, not wanting him to JUMP too fast into the next phase—which would be of course, something related to older kids……we are waiting to hear from God, since He seeks us. We are reading and doing the workbook Experiencing God together–at the same time, in the same place at home. This is making us be patient to hear His answer and call to us while we can still visit folks in the rest home, volunteer at places, serve at church…….. And we know He will provide when He calls us to do something CRAZY out of our comfort zone!!!! We look forward to the challenge. Get out of the rut–you can do it! So much to be thankful for and to push yourself. We are 51 and 56. Thought it would be easier when our kids got older–why isn’t it? Think I am bogged down with too much stuff–plain and simple and it is overwhelming and someone needs to come take it all away!! Have you read One Thousand Gifts by Anne Voscamp? At least give her Blog a try–encourages me everyday— Don’t stop praying 🙂 Give yourself time limits on things you think you are “wasting” or spending too much time on (internet). Mine is Flickr with my pictures wanting “approval” from other people–how silly! Where can I use that talent to glorify God instead of posting on Flickr to glorify ME!! Time to stop rambling….. Prayer is with you.
Do we have free will? Yes, I do believe we do. Does God know how we will choose..Of course he does. But perhaps in the choosing, we are being tested. The test is for us, to see if we will pass it or not. God may know the answer, but the choice of it is ours.
You seem to be wondering what is God’s will for you right now in your life.
“What am I supposed to be doing and why am I here are my favorite questions right now to ask God.”
I have struggled with this. 4 years ago I became partially disabled and unable to work. I had worked for 40 years, raised 3 kids, put my husband through college and struggled along with him during many career stops and starts. I got a lot of my identity from my work environment and knew that was where God wanted me to be. When I became disabled and no longer a worker bee, it scared me. I wallowed in self=pity a lot and wondered how I could be of service now. Then I remembered what I learned when I took the Experiencing God study and remembered that God’s will is not always given in black and white. If I wanted to know and be in the will of God, I deeded to see where He is working and join in. He would show me where and what he wanted of me as I worked with Him where He is working. I joined a BSF study, even though I could barely write or type to complete my answers to questions. That was a year and a half ago. I have learned how to write (although my penmanship leaves much to be desired) and have learned how to type again (albeit slowly). And just this September I heard and responded to God’s call to lead a Women’s bible Study at my church. still get lonely and I still wallow in self-pity, but I know now that God can still use me. So, my friend, keep asking God, look for where He is working and join Him. You never know where He will lead.
I truly think you are over asking and over evaluating the question “what am I suppose to do lord?” when in deed you ARE DOING AT THIS VERY MOMENT WHAT THE LORD wants you to do- raising your beautiful children he gave you (which alone is a full time job) and home schooling!!
Then you have time each day early in the morning (not getting enough sleep for yourself) to write and answer in depth with maps to go to -on the BSF questions! I am in my 7th year of BSF and last year was THRILLED to have found you. I do all my questions but print your blog everyday and you always enlighten me with more knowledge and different views of the questions. Since I have been following you I have truly learned more of the bible and his word.
YOU ARE A GIFT TO YOUR CHILDREN, HUSBAND AND ALL WHO FOLLOW YOU WITH BSF.
I admire your writing and your gifts from the lord. I can only say thank you to you and our blessed father for putting you in our lives.
Thank you and bless you.
Jill
Hey Jill,
I was just cleaning out my inbox and ran across some old emails from you and then you commented! How awesome!
How’s TX, your daughter, grandbabies, and yourself? Email me updates if you’d like (atozmom.wordpress@gmail.com).
Thank you for your lovely words and God Bless!
Hello i have been feeling the same way Asking Lord what i supposed to be doing. My situation is i lived out of state i lost my job And i couldnt land another and the economy was bad there And i couldnt afford to live there without a job move back to my hometown i have had houssitting job it here and there In between i havent found a full timme job And going through the same thing I sent resume out applied everywhere register social networking sites Living right now with family And never throught it be that of hard time finding work in my hometown I’m at cross roads would really like to just pack up and move back out state that where i was happy But without a job i cant I just feel like i go through the motions In life And like a waiting game Any suggestions would be appreicated Thank you Carolyn
Hey Carolyn,
I feel for you. We’ve been through the same thing. My advice would be to pray and listen. In this economy, I wouldn’t move without a job. It’s just too rough out there. Sometimes life is a waiting game. But keep chugging along. Paths will open up and God will put you where you were meant to be. You’ve probably heard this before and may be tired of hearing it but keep the faith. God will reward you!
God bless and good luck!