Paul uses the ancient Greek word agape. The ancient Greeks had four different words for love:
1) Eros was one word for love. It described, as we might guess from the word itself, erotic love. It refers to sexual love.
2) Storge was the second word for love. It refers to family love, the kind of love there is between a parent and child, or between family members in general.
3) Philia is the third word for love. It speaks of a brotherly friendship and affection. It is the love of deep friendship and partnership. It might be described as the highest love of which man, without God’s help, is capable of.
4) Agape is the fourth word for love. It is a love that loves without changing. It is a self-giving love that gives without demanding or expecting repayment. It is love so great that it can be given to the unlovable or unappealing. It is love that loves even when it is rejected. Agape love gives and loves because it wants to; it does not demand or expect repayment from the love given. It gives because it loves; it does not love in order to receive. According to Alan Redpath, we get our English word agony from agape. “It means the actual absorption of our being in one great passion.” (Redpath) Strictly speaking, agape can’t be defined as “God’s love,” because men are said to agape sin and the world (John 3:19 and 1 John 2:15). But it can be defined as a sacrificial, giving, absorbing kind of love. The word has little to do with emotion; it has much to do with self-denial for the sake of another.
We can read this chapter and think that Paul is saying that if we are unfriendly, then our lives mean nothing. But agape isn’t really friendliness; it is self-denial for the sake of another.
Basically, all the good or sacrifice you do is meaningless if there is no love involved. The rich young ruler did not have love (Matthew 16:19-23)
There were some early Christians so arrogant as to think that the blood of martyrdom would wash away any sin. They were so proud about their ability to endure suffering for Jesus, they thought it was the most important thing in the Christian life. It is important, but not the most important. Love is the most important. Otherwise, it is meaningless and without gain.
Some believe the burning referred to here is not execution, but branding as a criminal or as a slave for the sake of the gospel. The more likely sense is execution, but it really matters little, because the essential meaning is the same – great personal sacrifice.
Many Christians believe the Christian life is all about sacrifice – sacrificing your money, your life, for the cause of Jesus Christ. Sacrifice is important, but, again, without love is is meaningless.
All of this is good but Paul here is talking about the best: love.
Love suffers long and is kind.
Love is described by action words, not by lofty concepts. Paul is not writing about how love feels, he is writing about how it can be seen in action. True love is always demonstrated by action.
Love will endure a long time. It is the heart shown in God when it is said of the Lord, The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance (2 Peter 3:9). If God’s love is in us, we will show longsuffering to those who annoy us and hurt us.
c. Love is kind: When we have and show God’s love, it will be seen in simple acts of kindness. A wonderful measure of kindness is to see how children receive us. Children won’t receive from or respond to unkind people.
Eight things love is not: envious, boastful, proud, rude, self-seeking, angry, spiteful, nor delighted with evil.
Envy is one of the least productive and most damaging of all sins. It accomplishes nothing, except to hurt. Love keeps its distance from envy, and does not resent it when someone else is promoted or blessed. Clarke describes the heart which does not envy: “They are ever willing that others should be preferred before them.”
Is envy a small sin? Envy murdered Abel (Genesis 4:3-8). Envy enslaved Joseph (Genesis 37:11, 28). Envy put Jesus on the cross: For he knew that they had handed Him over because of envy (Matthew 27:18).
Love does not boast: Love in action can work anonymously. It does not have to have the limelight or the attention to do a good job, or to be satisfied with the result. Love gives because it loves to give, not out of the sense of praise it can have from showing itself off.
Sometimes the people who seem to work the hardest at love are the ones the furthest from it. They do things many would perceive as loving, yet they do them in a manner that would parade itself. This isn’t love; it is pride looking for glory by the appearance of love.
Love is not puffed up: To be puffed up is to be arrogant and self-focused. It speaks of someone who has a “big head.” Love doesn’t get its head swelled; it focuses on the needs of others.
Love is not rude: Where there is love, there will be kindness and good manners.
Love is not self-seeking: Paul communicates the same idea in Romans 12:10: in honor giving preference to one another. Also, Philippians 2:4 carries the same thought: Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others. This is being like Jesus in a most basic way, being an others-centered person instead of a self-centered person.
Love is not provoked: We all find it easy to be provoked or to become irritated with those who are just plain annoying. But it is a sin to be provoked, and it isn’t love. Moses was kept from the Promised Land because he became provoked at the people of Israel (Numbers 20:2-11).
Love thinks no evil: Literally this means “love does not store up the memory of any wrong it has received.” Love will put away the hurts of the past instead of clinging to them.
h. Love does not rejoice in iniquity: It is willing to want the best for others, and refuses to color things against others. Instead, love rejoices in the truth.
Love always protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres. Spurgeon called these four virtues “love’s four sweet companions.”
Always or All things: We might have hoped Paul would have chosen any phrase but this! All things covers everything! We can all bear some things, we can all believe some things, we can all hope some things, and we can all endure some things.
“Love does not ask to have an easy life of it: self-love makes that her aim. Love denies herself, sacrifices herself, that she may win victories for God, and hers shall be no tinsel crown.” (Spurgeon)
Love bears all things: The word for bears can also be translated covers. Either way, Paul brings an important truth along with 1 Peter 4:8: And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins.”
“I would, my brothers and sisters, that we could all imitate the pearl oyster. A hurtful particle intrudes itself into its shell, and this vexes and grieves it. It cannot eject the evil, and what does it do but cover it with a precious substance extracted out of its own life, by which it turns the intruder into a pearl. Oh, that we could do so with the provocations we receive from our fellow Christians, so that pearls of patience, gentleness, long-suffering, and forgiveness might be bred within us by that which has harmed us.” (Spurgeon)
Love believes all things: We never believe a lie, but we never believe evil unless the facts demand it. We choose to believe the best of others.
Love hopes all things: Love has confidence in the future, not pessimism. When hurt, it does not say, “It will be this way forever, and even get worse.” It hopes for the best, and it hopes in God.
Love endures all things: Most of us can bear all things, and believe all things, and hope all things, but only for a while! The greatness of agape love is it keeps on bearing, believing, and hoping. It doesn’t give up. It destroys enemies by turning them into friends.
The best way to understand each of these is to see them in the life of Jesus. We could replace the word love with the name Jesus and the description would make perfect sense. We can easily say, Jesus suffers long and is kind; Jesus does not envy . . . and make it through the whole chapter.
We can measure our spiritual maturity by seeing how it sounds when we put our name in place of the word love. Does it sound totally ridiculous or just a “little” far-fetched?
There is a reason why Paul put this chapter in the midst of his discussion of spiritual gifts. Paul wants the Corinthian Christians to remember that giftedness is not the measure of maturity, the display of love is.
Love never fails: Paul addresses the over-emphasis the Corinthian Christians had on the gifts of the Holy Spirit. He shows they should emphasize love more than the gifts, because the gifts are temporary “containers” of God’s work; love is the work itself.
Therefore, the gifts of the Holy Spirit are appropriate for the present time, but they are not permanent. They are imperfect gifts for an imperfect time.
In his use of will fail and will cease and will vanish away, Paul, under the inspiration of the Holy Spirit, is not trying to say that prophecies, tongues, and knowledge have different fates. He is simply writing well, saying the same thing in three different ways. They will end, but love never fails.