“What Am I Supposed to Be Doing Here, Lord?”

I keep asking this right now in my life.

I feel I have all these passions and talents and yet no direction and no motivation.

What am I supposed to be doing and why am I here are my favorite questions right now to ask God.

This follows yesterday’s Free Will post.  I can choose what to do but is it what I’m supposed to be doing or is it something else entirely–and worst, is it in the wrong direction?

Is it all for naught?  A waste of my precious time I could be doing something with my kids?

I question everything these days.  I just wish it would be clear…

I fight every day the question of what’s the point?  Nothing makes sense right now.

Yet all I can do is what I have been doing…praying and waiting and seeking the sign, the answer in whatever form it may come.

Do We Truly Have Free Will?

This question was raised on my blog and I think it’s a good one to explore.

Do we have Free Will when God knows what we are going to do before we do it? How can this be reconciled?

It’s quite the dichotomy, isn’t it? We can choose but God knows what we’re going to choose before we choose it. I always wonder if we can change our minds without God knowing it or not. If we can change our path. But then God wouldn’t know, would He?

It plays into control. We think we are in control of our lives but God has it all figured out and He is truly in control because He knows and we don’t. You think, “Is God toying with me here? Just tell me, God, since you know!”

I think it’s a design by God to make man depend on Him more. We slowly (sometimes VERY slowly) realize we’re not in control so we must depend and trust in God and in the process grow closer to Him.

That’s how I see it anyways.  Any more thoughts?

A Lion Called Christian

My girls picked up this book on tape entitled A Lion Called Christian by Anthony Bourke and John Rendall from the library.  It had a picture of a lion on the cover.

I asked them what it was about when they were finished and they explained to me it was about a lion cub bought in a department store and re-introduced to the wild.

The cover has “YouTube Sensation” so of course I googled it.

Here’s what I found:


Be prepared to weep every time you watch this.  It’s heart-wrenching and beautiful all at the same time.  To think a wild animal could love so deeply…

I know I would not have been able to do such a thing:  let the cub go.  Even though it was the right thing to do.  I become too attached.  I can’t stand the thought of not being there when my two old dogs die so not knowing what’s happening to Christian the Lion would tear me up.  I would constantly be wondering how Christian was doing, what he was doing, if he were okay, etc.  And I would miss him and his love.

Bourke and Rendall saw Christian one more time after this in 1974 but was never seen afterwards.  If you google, you can see multiple interviews with these two and more clips of Christian and the Last Reunion.

Remarkable story that shows just how intelligent animals are, how only God could create such creatures, and the incredible power of a bond formed in adolescence.

When I watch a wild lion jump on his owners in greeting, I’m speechless.  Animals are much more than meets the eye and there must be a purpose to all this–life.  I think, “Life couldn’t get any better than that” for those two guys in that moment.  Knowing the impact you’ve had on an animal.  Just think the impact you have on your kids…

This is also a book which I haven’t read but it has glowing reviews on Amazon.

A touching story I had to share–one that will hopefully make you think about animals in a different light and support the survival of all species on this planet.


“Each of us has a unique destiny, sire,” said Merlin, “There’s much to be gained by understanding your role in life and much to be lost by ignoring it.”

Merlin is speaking to King Arthur of course in this book by Hudson Talbott. Arthur has grown bored with merely ruling a kingdom and he is yearning to go on quests and adventures like the rest of his knights.

There is much wisdom here.  We all do have a role ordained by God and understanding it is crucial to happiness here.

Merlin again imparts wisdom to his young protege:  “Sooner or later we must all face a defeat.  Greatness lives in one who knows how to learn from victory or defeat and goes on to carry out his duty.”

For me, I face little defeats every day.  But it’s the ability to keep trudging along, keeping in mind our life’s purpose, that defines me.

And if I had to guess, probably the same goes for you as well.

Great kids book.  I love the classics and King Arthur is one of my favorites. Hudson Talbott has a few of these gems (we just finished Lancelot) that are beautifully illustrated and short enough to read in one sitting.  My favorite page has a picture of a Questing Beast and he’s so cute!  I’ve always had a soft spot for dragons (Remember my Puff the Magic Dragon post?) and this guy is part dragon, part deer, part cheetah.  But very friendly!  Highly recommended.

The Witch Who Wanted to be a Princess

This is a very cute kids book by Lois G Grambling about a witch named Bella who wants to be a princess.  They have banned her from turning herself into a princess so she decides to marry a prince instead.  She worries she might be too ugly (especially with a wart on her nose) so she consults her magic mirror.

Her magic mirror tells her “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder” so Bella reasons since she sees herself as beautiful then she is!

She answers a personal ad in the paper placed by a Prince Franklyn of Styne, who is none other than Frankenstein.

They fall in love, get married, and live happily ever-after (and so do their cats!).

Very lively and colorful illustrations made this a favorite with my kids.  Throw in the great message of self-contentment and internal beauty and this book is a winner with me too!

Lois G Grambling also writes cute books on dinosaurs as well, which are some of my son’s favorites.

Do You Ever Wonder What Happens After the Headline?

I’m talking about all those news stories you read where someone dies, a tragedy befalls a family, a child gets kidnapped and killed, and then the story disappears from the news, replaced by the next “tragic event”?  I’m not talking about those that stay in the headlines like Casey Anthony.  I’m talking about the hundreds of stories in your local paper you hear about every year that you never hear about again.

These are families, impacted for life.  I wonder what happens after the tragedy.

Yes, people go on.  Sometimes because life moves on and you must move with it.  And sometimes the paper will do a follow-up story.  But not usually.  I guess there are too many new tragedies to report on to follow the old ones.  Life…

I often wonder how I’d react if such an event happened to me.  I usually pray for that person and then thank God for my family’s blessings.

Then I think of all the people who are suffering personal tragedies–those whom you don’t hear about.  Such as health problems, work problems, money problems, kid problems, and on and on and on.

Life is so many things:  tragic, fulfilling, complicated, simple, full of hope and love, full of sadness and neediness, rich and beautiful, blessed and ugly and dirty, torn down.

My husband’s grandmother always says, “In 6 months, your problems will change and this “problem” you are going through will be just a blip on the radar screen of life.”

So true…