Category: Faith

Is It a Sin to Marry a Non-Believer?

by atozmom, posted in Faith

Our Bible Study Fellowship teaching leader flat out said this week, “It’s a sin to be married to a non-believer.”  I immediately blanched because I’ve never heard this before.

Being that we discussed marriage and the passages that believers use to assert this assumption last year in BSF’s study of Acts, I was indeed curious.  For this was never mentioned AT ALL.

All we talked about were Paul’s words in 1 Corinthians 7:12-16 and not once did anyone say it was a sin to marry or be married to a non-believer.  It was all about IF you were married to one, what do you do?

Resolved to find the answer, I researched.

Again, it all comes down to translation of the Hebrew and Greek words that the Bible was originally written in.

The main passage people use to assert this assumption is 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 “Do not be yoked together with unbelievers.  For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common?”

The key word is yoked.  But this is the NIV translation.  This word is translated differently in other translations.

I’m curious as to what you all think.

Personally, I don’t think it’s a sin.

Remember the definition of sin, which according to Webster’s Dictionary is “a transgression of the law of God”.  Transgression means a violation of a law or command; to go beyond the limits.

According to my bible dictionary (Zondervan Illustrated Bible Dictionary by Douglas and Tenney) sin is “revolt against the holiness and sovereign will of God.  It is a condition of the heart and the outworking of that condition through one’s words and actions.”

I believe nothing in this world happens without God’s plan.  I believe God puts husbands and wives together for a purpose.  And I think one of these purposes is so you can influence your spouse and even save them through living a Christian life and in turn they turn to Jesus.

We are called to “be imitators of God” (Ephesians 5:1) and I believe it is our example that leads others to Christ.

If you love an unbeliever enough to marry him or her, then God loves them enough for you to save them for Him.  It’s the same for family members.  It is our duty to bring them to God.  To show them God’s love that dwells in us–for them.

I believe it is God’s will.

Now should you go seeking a marriage with an unbeliever?  No.  Should you be wary before you say I do?  Yes.  Is it prudent to marry one?  No.

But it’s God’s will.  Not our own.

I find it hard that Paul who spoke so much about marriage wouldn’t come out and clearly say, “It is a sin to marry an unbeliever so don’t.”  Thus, I just don’t see this as a “law” put forth by God similar to the Ten Commandments.

Again, it’s all interpretation and translation.  And since none of us lived in the first century AD or asked Paul himself what he meant here, we can’t say for certain.

And we all know how languages change (see my spiel on the nature of languages HERE.)  Some words just don’t translate perfectly into other languages.  If you’ve ever studied another language or lived in a country with a different native tongue, you know what I mean.

Even within the same language.  England has many phrases that do not translate into American and vice versa.  Same with Spanish.  The Spanish in Spain is totally different from the Spanish of the Americas and even within the countries of the Americas.  Just ask Chileans and their “modismos”.

To me, love is stronger.  Don’t condemn others because they married an unbeliever.  Leave that to God.  But love them instead.

I do find it hard to believe this wasn’t talked about last year.  I looked up my post from last year when we studied 2 Corinthians and I even said in my conclusions I was disappointed BSF DID NOT talk about this.  View the post HERE

We did discuss 1 Corinthians 7 (HERE) and only talked about what to do if you are married to a non-believer.  And no where do I remember the word SIN entering the picture.

Once again, I’m disappointed in BSF.  They probably didn’t want to offend people by bringing up this very important debate (I think) in today’s society.  Because I bet a good majority of people are married to unbelievers.

I want to know.  Is it a sin?  Am I wrong to think it isn’t?  What’s the Scripture that speaks to this besides the ones above?

I attend BSF to get answers to questions I have.  This to me is important.  I need to know this since marriage affects most of the world’s population.  I need to know this for those around me.  For my kids who will one day marry.

Maybe I’m just too much of a “complainer” as some of you think.  Or I expect too much.  Or I question too much.  Or there is obviously something wrong with me….

I just want to be challenged that’s all.  So I can grow and be more like Jesus and change my thinking if needs be.

To me, this is challenging.

END NOTE:  One post I found that proposes it is a sin to marry a non-believer:

http://www.reasonablefaith.org/marrying-a-non-christian

Another article that says we should ask instead “Why would you want to marry a non-believer?” but the author also believes it to be a sin:

http://www.christianitytoday.com/biblestudies/bible-answers/marriage/unequallyyoked.html

What Do You Do When You Feel Like the Whole World is Against You?

by atozmom, posted in Faith

This morning I fell.

Suffice it to say, my back and my mouth hurts.  My lip is swollen and my teeth hurt.  I’d go to the doc/dentist but it’s all so swollen there’s nothing to be determined.  Plus, I’d like to see if it’s all just my overblown imagination that “something’s wrong” before rushing anywhere.

So, I was angry about that.

Then I was working on my novel and I had to chuck the whole first chapter.  And that always gets me thinking, “Is this really worth it?”

I don’t  know about you, but I always am thinking what else I could be doing with my time.  I’d love to lay in bed all day long, sipping coffee, and reading a book.  Never happens.  One day maybe.

When stupid stuff like falling (my fault by the way) happens to me I always wonder, “What’s the point?”

Of being healthy.  Of striving to do my best.  Of working so hard with never seeing results.  Of striving to do God’s will and always feeling at the end of the day that I’ve failed.

It just all seems pointless, meaningless.

I know exactly how the author of Ecclesiastes feels.  Exactly.

You live a life and in the end what do you have to show for it?  Pain, heartache, trials, difficulties, and some joy and triumphs.

But why is it the trials always seem to trump the triumphs?  Funny how the word trump and triumph are so similar.

I pray to God “Why?” and just once I’d wish He’d speak to me like He did the prophets.  Just once.

Yes, I know.  You have God to show for it.  But in the moment it’s easy to believe He’s far away.

I feel like this world is against me.  So what do I do?

The crazy answer is the same thing I always do:  keep at it.  Never giving up.  Keep moving forward.  Taking the hits as best I can when they come and praying for strength through them.  Then relishing the triumphs that always seem lagging when they do show their face.

So, I lay on my dog and shed a few tears on her fur as she sniffs me, wondering what’s wrong with Mommy today.  I pray I can feel my mouth again soon and pray my back is just bruised.  And pray I’m not so stupid the next time around.

Then I pray for strength, courage, and perseverance for this day.

For if I make it through today, I’ll make it through tomorrow.

In God’s Hands

by atozmom, posted in Book Reviews, Faith

In God’s Hands by Lawrence Kushner and Gary Schmidt is a charming traditional Jewish folktale of obeying God that children will be sure to delight in.

Jacob, a rich man, always feel asleep during service but one day he woke up just long enough to hear one verse from Leviticus, saying he should make 12 loaves of challah and give them to God.

Believing it had been God who had spoken to him, Jacob obeys.  He bakes the challah and brings it to the synagogue and places it in the ark.

David, a poor man with a family to feed who cleans the synagogue, finds the challah and believes God has answered his prayers for food.

This cycle continues on for years with Jacob believing God ate the challahs and David believing God made the challahs until one day the rabbi discovers what is happening.  He calls the two men together and reveals the truth.  At first, both are disheartened as their belief in God is shattered.

But the rabbi points out that even though their conception is wrong, they must go on continuing to make the bread, knowing how both of their hands are God’s hands, doing His work, for His people.

Great lesson for all about obeying the whispers from God and seeing how the outcome of obedience is God’s plan with often unpredictable and wonderful results.  My kids loved this tale and couldn’t wait to read it again.

“The Lord Will Fight For You; You Need Only to Be Still.”

by atozmom, posted in Faith

Exodus 14:14

Words from Moses to the Israelites I needed to hear today and I thought some of you might need to as well.

Substitute I for “the Lord” and picture God whispering this in your ear and you’ll get a beautiful picture to last the rest of the day (and beyond).  Magic.  Powerful.  Life-giving. From Father to daughter or son.

Do You Ever Long for Heaven?

by atozmom, posted in Faith
Beautiful Sunrise!

This was a question that arose in my other bible study and I found it fascinating.

If you are a believer, then your true home is heaven.  You are a transient here on Earth, here for a short time to accomplish God’s purpose for your life, and then taken back home.

But do you long for it?

My answer was no, I don’t.  And I think because I know I have not accomplished God’s purpose for me here on earth yet.  I am constantly striving to fulfill His desires; it’s what drives me.  And I am so consumed by this that thoughts of heaven (for me anyways) are few and far between.

I think when I get closer to finishing God’s work for me here these thoughts will become more and more frequent.

You could chalk this up to age.  As you get older, you think more and more about dying, God, and heaven.  But for me, I believe it’s more the former:  having to do with accomplishing God’s work for me.  I believe only then will I find rest.

So does this lead to a sense of comfort here on Earth?  I’ve never thought about comfort per se.  I’m so impatient to do His work that it consumes me most of the time.  I’ve never been one to covet fancy things anyways so as long as I have food, clothing, shelter, and my kids and husband are happy, I’m good.

Are we supposed to be comfortable here on Earth when it’s not our home?  John 10:10 says we are to live life to the full.  What what is the full?  Is it material items or is it peace, That’s for you to decide.  Check your gut.  What does it tell you?

Our teacher says we are not supposed to be comfortable here on earth.  We’re supposed to be uneasy.  I just don’t think about comfort much to be honest.  It’s not a main concern of mine.

BSF briefly touched upon this point in Lesson 27 Day 3 with John 15:19, reminding us that “the world hates you.”  So if the world hates us then we should be uncomfortable, right?

So what about you?  Are you at home here on Earth or comfortable or do you long for Heaven?  Or maybe a bit of both?

“Everything God Commands is Good for Us”

by atozmom, posted in Faith

Quote from my leader last night when speaking about submission to our husbands.  We tend to think of Ephesians 5:22-33 as taking something away from us.  But it’s quite the opposite.  Submitting to our husbands (and all of God’s laws) only builds us up, increases our sanctification, and changes us for the better.

Sometimes we think Seriously, God, do I have to do _____?!  Like tithing, giving to others, loving our enemies, forgiving others, being humble, and all those things we have no desire to do and which goes against our selfish nature.  But we must remember all of it is for our good–for us–and not just for God.  It’s all a process we must go through in our quest to be like Jesus.

While looking up sanctification in my Bible Dictionary (Zondervan’s Illustrated Bible Dictionary by J D Douglas and Merrill C Tenney), I came across this nugget to share as well:

“The notion of holiness, when applied to things, places, and people, means that they are consecrated and set apart for the use of God.”

I loved the idea that my whole purpose on earth is for God’s use.  He is using me.  I’ve always known I’ve had a God-given purpose.  But the idea “I am set apart for the use of God” just struck me.  I think it goes beyond our purpose (which tends to be only one or a handful of things) and encompasses other uses that we don’t think about.

Purpose tends to be more of us doing the doing.  God’s use is more of God doing the doing.

Just some thoughts to chew on this week!

Am I a Saint?

by atozmom, posted in Faith

Why is it that so many Christian terms are now derogatory in nature?

“She thinks she’s a saint!” is now commonly heard when someone is arrogant and prideful, a know-it-all or a hypocrite.  It has become something we do NOT want to be.

Yet God through Paul says otherwise.

If you believe in Jesus then you have been sanctified (made sacred, holy, and righteous) through the blood of Jesus.  That we “together with all the saints” (Ephesians 3:18) may know the fullness of God.

We hear all the time, “I’m no saint.”  Well, actually, if you’re a believer, you are.

Sure, you can chuck this up to euphemism or a figure of speech.  But our words are powerful and we should heed their hidden or implied messages.

Proverbs 18:21:  “The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it will eat its fruit.”

Jesus tells us “The things that come out of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man ‘unclean'” in Matthew 15:18

Paul tells us in Ephesians 4:29 “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up…”

Over time, all languages change including English.  New words and expressions are being added every day.  Some due to technology (IPad); others, slang (cool or rad come to mind).  Meanings change and some disappear all together.

But we should we wary when an underlying spiritual war is taking place.  I believe this is the case in this instance and many other ways where sacred words from the Bible are being twisted.  As we learned, it is Satan, working through the minds of unbelievers (Ephesians 2:2), who has twisted such words and tried to rob them of their power and meaning.

Our words and our language is as much a part of us as our arm:  integral to living.  We must treat them as such; monitor its well-being; be wary of what it does/says.  And not give in to peer pressure and society’s whims when it comes to berating the Christian faith.

When we hear the word ‘saint’ many of us think of the Saints who have been recognized by the Catholic religion as holy:  St Patrick, St Valentine, St Michael, St Joseph, St Francis of Assisi, St Christopher, and thousands of others.

According to Webster’s Dictionary, the first definition of saint is what I knew:  “one officially recognized esp. through canonization as preeminent for holiness.”  Definition #3:  “One of God’s chosen and usually Christian people.”

My Bible Dictionary has a fascination explanation of the origin of the word in terms of the Catholic usage (which does not correspond to Biblical usage it points out).  But in short, a saint is “a person sacred to God” according to Zondervan’s Illustrated Bible Dictionary by J.D Douglas and Merrill C Tenney.

I don’t know about you but I LOVE the idea that I (plain, ol’, insignificant me) am sacred to God!  I usually think of it as God being sacred, not me.  He is sacred to me.  Not I am sacred to Him.  But it makes sense.  Why else would He sacrifice His son?

This is what I love about BSF.  The Bible is so rich you can and do spend a lifetime studying and learning about it and BSF prompts me to learn things I otherwise wouldn’t think of (such as being a saint).

I had never heard of all Christians being Saints before now.  But if you are in Christ, have the Holy Spirit dwell within you then you are a Saint.  You don’t have to do any special works to be one (as I previously believed from definition #1 of Webster’s).

Therefore, I am a saint.  And I hope and pray you are too.

Am I Broken?

by atozmom, posted in Faith

This question popped in my mind during lecture this week and I’ve been mulling it over ever since.

We were talking about embracing suffering…

I have been fighting demons every day and it seems like I lose every day.

I woke up this morning with a new thought:  one day at a time.

In my other bible study (yes, I am now doing two and I’m not for sure why besides out of pure insanity) one lady talks about how her husband has not had a drink in 18 months. Admittedly, this annoyed me.  Until I realized it was a good idea.

Taking life one step at a time, one moment at a time, striving to do better, to be better–all under God’s grace.

To overcome whatever lies the devil is speaking to our hearts.  To think before act.  To remain calm when society says this world is anything but.

Am I broken?  Yes.  We all are.  And that is okay.

We don’t have to have it all together because if we did we’d be perfect.  And we all know the only One who’s perfect.

Yet in my brokenness I can still be all God wants me to be.  And more.

If I only choose to believe.  In me.  In Him.  In His purpose for my life.  And in my ability to overcome my demons.  In God’s power to do so.  Rebuke them and put them where they belong.  All as God’s grace and mercy flow.  Perpetually.  Forever.  Amen.

Whose Job is it to Judge?

by atozmom, posted in Faith

I have been taught we are not to judge anyone for any reason.  That is it Jesus’ job to judge on Judgement Day.

So when I read that Paul was judging in 1 Corinthians 5:3, I immediately thought, What’s going on here?  So, of course, I researched it and I’m glad I did.

The commandment not to judge comes from Jesus in Matthew 7:1-5.  He says, “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.  For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”

Well, we all know we will be judged, right?  So in one sense this doesn’t make sense either.

But Jesus is talking about hypocritical judgment, as demonstrated in verses 3-5 with the sawdust analogy.  Jesus is saying we are not to judge others by a standard we ourselves are not willing to be judged by.  So I should not condemn someone for  lying if I myself lie.  But I can if I don’t lie.

However, there’s a caveat to this which Paul brings up in 1 Corinthians 5:12-13.  We are not to judge unbelievers.  This is solely God’s job (which I think is where I was getting this from).

As Christians we are held to a higher standard by God (and rightly so).  We must walk the walk.  God expects more from us just like I expect more from my kids than other people’s kids.  He is our Father, after all!  We are expected to obey God and follow His commandments.  Behave as much as possible like Jesus.  Love one another.  Show compassion to those sufferings, orphans, and widows.  Everything the Bible talks about we are expected to do.

Now, as Paul says next in 1 Corinthians 1:12, “Are you not to judge those inside?”, meaning judging Christians.

Hence, we are to judge Christians who are disobeying God’s commandments but only if we are upholding them (which hopefully as God’s chosen people, we are).  We are to be accountable to one another for our actions.

So how does this apply for me?  Well, I have been operating under the attitude of “It’s none of my business what Suzy-Q does over there”, whether or not she’s a Christian or not.  Now, I realize if Suzy Q is a Christian I need to care about what she’s doing, if she’s following “the Way” as Paul calls the new Christian movement, and call her out if she’s not.  This is my job as a believer–to keep her on the right path so she is ready for Judgment Day.

And if she refuses to correct her behavior?  As Paul says, “you must not associate with anyone who calls himself a brother but is sexually immoral or greedy…” (1 Corinthians 5:11)  etc.  We do this out of love not out of punishment.  To hopefully get the person to correct their path and fully accept them once corrected.  You must be accountable for your actions or face the consequences, which society today had told everyone there are no consequences or personal responsibility.

This is something I’m going to have to chew on for a bit in order to wrap my mind around.  It makes sense especially when I think of my immediate family.  I get riled when I see something happening around me that goes against my beliefs, but I have always fought the temptation not to say something.  I think I was being prodded to say something but society and culture today has been so ingrained in me that I usually don’t.

In one way it’s a relief.  I don’t have to feel guilty if I tell someone out of love that I think what they are doing is wrong and not in line with God.  It’s refreshing and emboldening to be honest.  And not just my family.  For anyone really.

And it’s something I’m supposed to do.  Something probably just as important as spreading the Good News.

Because we all Fall and sometimes we need someone to confront us on our failures in order to get back on God’s path.  Lovingly and compassionately.  Biblically.

The right thing to do.  Of which we must never tire.  (2 Thessalonians 3:13)